We have a surprise for you today, we decided to write this week’s blog together!
The holiday season can bring up a lot of feelings and emotions, right? Though holiday sentiment tends to be wrapped in merriment and cheer, it can often leave us feeling isolated, sad, and even resentful. We both know firsthand what it’s like to manage the wide range of emotions that the holidays reveal, so we want you to know that feeling this way, is completely normal!
Here’s how we’ve work through the difficult feelings that the holidays can bring up:
Nostalgia: It’s very natural and normal to glamorize and reminisce about past holiday experiences. This is how our human minds work. We think about all the good things that used to happen, and then we compare those memories to the present moment. This can make us feel is lacking in some way.
The important thing about nostalgia is that it’s not the whole story. Please remember that you’re not being fair to yourself when you use this as an argument for why the things that are happening in this moment aren’t enough. Allow yourself to reminisce, but don’t let yourself live in the past. Bring your mind back to the present. Remind yourself that you are worthy of life’s blessings and that difficult times don’t last forever. Slowly cultivate gratitude for what is happening right now.
Grief: The holidays are hard for those of us who are missing friends, family, and loved ones. The truth is there is no cure for grief, but there are ways to work with grief to ease the pain, especially at this time of year. Allow yourself the time and space to remember the ones you’re missing. Feel the feelings that arise, and know that it’s okay to miss someone.
We like to reframe sadness to gratitude. Remind yourself that a loss means that there was once a person you loved deeply. Notice and feel the love in your heart. Feel gratitude for the love that you have, and understand deeply that just because this love has changed in physical form, it does not mean that it’s gone, or that you can’t carry on the love and emotions for the person in your heart.
Disappointment: It’s the end of the year, and so we naturally start to take an inventory of the year that has passed. Our minds immediately tend to focus on what is still lacking, what went wrong, and what didn’t get accomplished. It’s okay to feel like there are pieces of your life that aren’t quite where you want them to be. Rather than allowing these feelings to make you feel less than, use them as fuel and inspiration.
If you’re disappointed about something in your life, know that a new year can bring brand new opportunities to create what you desire. This year is almost over, so thank yourself for showing up fully. Recognize that we are not here to be perfect, so could it be that all that you have accomplished is enough? Just maybe it is more than enough, loves.
Loneliness: Especially during the holidays, we are bombarded with many images and advertisements that make us feel that if we aren’t surrounded by loved ones, or if our relationships don’t look like what we see on TV, then there is something wrong with us, so our holidays can’t be joyful. This is just a big, fat lie! The greatest thing about life is that we can choose to define how our life plays out, and this is so important to remember during the holiday season.
You are the boss of your life. You are the author of your story. You can always choose how much significance and importance you want to place on this holiday. There is nothing wrong, odd, or sad about being alone at this time. Do what feels comfortable and right for you.
Our deepest desire is that wherever you are, and however you are feeling, that you find comfort and strength from the inside knowing that you are enough, you are complete, you are worthy, and you are loved.
We love you and send big hugs, support, and blessings this holiday season and all throughout the new year.
~xoxo Michelle and Barb